‘Abortion can change men’s lives too’

A few weeks back, this column looked into the plight of older women who had to opt for abortions when they believed they wouldn’t be able to cope with looking after an additional child. Christopher, 38, an analyst for a consultancy firm and a male reader wondered why male views weren’t considered in the said write-up; afterall, it takes two to get  pregnant. His views: ‘’Abortion is seen as an almost entirely female issue.

However, it affects men too. I met Rose, a dental assistant eight years ago and fell for her instantly. As we were in our late 20s, we talked early on about what might happen if she accidentally became pregnant and both of us agreed we would want to keep the baby. Although I never dreamt it would happen as she was on the pill, I thought I knew where we stood.

“Then a couple of months into our relationship, Rose rang to say she’d had a dizzy spell and felt nauseous. I suggested she take a pregnancy test. I hadn’t been looking to become a father but would want to make it work. So when she rang me back to announce she was pregnant, her next words shocked me. ‘I’ve decided to have an abortion,’ she said simply, ‘I don’t want this baby and it’s my choice to make.’ Over the next few

weeks, we talked a lot. I felt powerless – all I could do was listen to

Rose’s reasons and try desperately to show her we could make things work. I even offered-to raise the child alone. My mum had constantly been on my back to give her grandchildren as I’m her only child. She would have gladly helped to look after the baby. But all my pleas fell on deaf ears. Ultimately, having an abortion was Rose’s right – I had no say in the matter. Afterall, it was her body.

How to cope when you’re years older than your girlfriend

IN general, when experts talk about fine-tuning a relationship, they suggest ways both partners can compromise and adjust. Not so with the older man! younger girl pairing. “In testing the waters of male-female love, the girl has to splash – and pay attention to her own strokes,” says Janice a seasoned relationship expert. “She needs to be childish at times, to fret, to go beyond the bounds of conventional behaviour to act on impulse and sometimes to enslave herself to the loved one. It is therefore up to the man to measure whether he is the right person to chase and hold her.
“The older man should first of all have lots of time. She expects demands that the relationship take first priority every day, every week. He may be flying to the end of the world next morning, but if she needs to talk about their love all the night before, listen he must! He should also have a physique that’s in good shape, and be secure in his sex appeal. Today’s teen is lean and mean!

Must read article: your goodness will surely find you no matter wear you hide

 

A must READ - Good morning said a woman as she walked up to a man sitting on a bench.
The man slowly looked up.
This was a woman clearly accustomed to the finer things of life. Her coat was new.. She looked like she had never missed a meal in her life.

His first thought was that she wanted to make fun of him, like so many others had done before.. "Leave me alone," he growled....
To his amazement, the woman continued standing.
She was smiling... her even white teeth displayed in dazzling rows. "Are you hungry?" she asked.
"No," he answered sarcastically. "I've just come from dining with the president. Now go away."
The woman's smile became even broader. Suddenly the man felt a gentle hand under his arm.
"What are you doing, lady?" the man asked angrily. "I said to leave me alone.
Just then a policeman came up. "Is there any problem, ma'am?" he asked..
"No problem here, officer," the woman answered. "I'm just trying to get this man to his feet. Will you help me?"
The officer scratched his head. "That's old Jack. He's been a fixture around here for a couple of years. What do you want with him?"
"See that cafeteria over there?" she asked. "I'm going to get him something to eat and get him out of the cold for awhile."
"Are you crazy, lady?" the homeless man resisted. "I don't want to go in there!" Then he felt strong hands grab his other arm and lift him up. "Let me go, officer. I didn't do anything."
"This is a good deal for you, Jack" the officer answered. "Don't blow it.."
Finally, and with some difficulty, the woman and the police officer got Jack into the cafeteria and sat him at a table in a remote corner. It was the middle of the morning, so most of the breakfast crowd had already left and the lunch bunch had not yet arrived...
The manager strode across the cafeteria and stood by his table. "What's going on here, officer?" he asked. "What is all this, is this man in trouble?"
"This lady brought this man in here to be fed," the policeman answered.
"Not in here!" the manager replied angrily. "Having a person like that here is bad for business."
Old Jack smiled a toothless grin. "See, lady. I told you so. Now if you'll let me go. I didn't want to come here in the first place."
The woman turned to the cafeteria manager and smiled... "Sir, are you familiar with Eddy and Associates, the banking firm down the street?"
"Of course I am," the manager answered impatiently. "They hold their weekly meetings in one of my banquet rooms."
"And do you make a godly amount of money providing food at these weekly meetings?"
"What business is that of yours?"
I, sir, am Penelope Eddy, president and CEO of the company."
"Oh."
The woman smiled again. "I thought that might make a difference." She glanced at the cop who was busy stifling a giggle. "Would you like to join us in a cup of coffee and a meal, officer?"
"No thanks, ma'am," the officer replied. "I'm on duty."
"Then, perhaps, a cup of coffee to go?"
"Yes, ma’am. That would be very nice."
The cafeteria manager turned on his heel, "I'll get your coffee for you right away, officer."
The officer watched him walk away. "You certainly put him in his place," he said.
"That was not my intent. Believe it or not, I have a reason for all this."
She sat down at the table across from her amazed dinner guest. She stared at him intently... "Jack, do you remember me?"
Old Jack searched her face with his old, rheumy eyes. "I think so - I mean you do look familiar."
"I'm a little older perhaps," she said. "Maybe I've even filled out more than in my younger days when you worked here, and I came through that very door, cold and hungry."
"Ma'am?" the officer said questioningly. He couldn't believe that such a magnificently turned out woman could ever have been hungry.
"I was just out of college," the woman began. "I had come to the city looking for a job, but I couldn't find anything. Finally I was down to my last few cents and had been kicked out of my apartment. I walked the streets for days. It was February and I was cold and nearly starving. I saw this place and walked in on the off chance that I could get something to eat."
Jack lit up with a smile. "Now I remember," he said.. "I was behind the serving counter. You came up and asked me if you could work for something to eat. I said that it was against company policy."
"I know," the woman continued. "Then you made me the biggest roast beef sandwich that I had ever seen, gave me a cup of coffee, and told me to go over to a corner table and enjoy it. I was afraid that you would get into trouble... Then, when I looked over and saw you put the price of my food in the cash register, I knew then that everything would be all right."
"So you started your own business?" Old Jack said.
"I got a job that very afternoon. I worked my way up. Eventually I started my own business that, with the help of God, prospered." She opened her purse and pulled out a business card. "When you are finished here, I want you to pay a visit to a Mr. Lyons... He's the personnel director of my company. I'll go talk to him now and I'm certain he'll find something for you to do around the office." She smiled. "I think he might even find the funds to give you a little advance so that you can buy some clothes and get a place to live until you get on your feet... If you ever need anything, my door is always open to you."
There were tears in the old man's eyes. "How can I ever thank you?" he said.
"Don't thank me," the woman answered. "To God goes the glory. Thank Jesus...... He led me to you."
Outside the cafeteria, the officer and the woman paused at the entrance before going their separate ways....
"Thank you for all your help, officer," she said.
"On the contrary, Ms. Eddy," he answered. "Thank you. I saw a miracle today, something that I will never forget. And.. And thank you for the coffee."
God is going to shift things around for you today and let things work in your favor.
If you believe, send it.
If you don't believe, delete it.
God closes doors no man can open & God opens doors no man can close..
If you need God to open some doors for you...send this on.


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WORLD CLASS INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES

Inspirational Quotes

Try not to become a man of success but a man of value.

Albert Einstein

If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them.
Henry David Thoreau

Inspiration and genius--one and the same.
Victor Hugo

To find what you seek in the road of life,
the best proverb of all is that which says:
"Leave no stone unturned."
Edward Bulwer Lytton

Doubt whom you will, but never yourself.
Christian Nestell Bovee

If you would create something,
you must be something.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Every artist was first an amateur.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

The more difficulties one has to encounter, within and without, the more significant and the higher in inspiration his life will be.
Horace Bushnell

Nothing is worth more than this day.
You cannot relive yesterday.
Tomorrow is still beyond our reach.
Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence, but it comes from within. It is there all of the time.
Anna Freud

In any project the important factor is your belief. Without belief, there can be no successful outcome.
William James

Do not wait; the time will never be "just right." Start where you stand.
Napoleon Hill

I avoid looking forward or backward, and try to keep looking upward.
Charlotte Brontë

Life has no smooth road for any of us; and in the bracing atmosphere of a high aim the very roughness stimulates the climber to steadier steps, till the legend, over steep ways to the stars, fulfills itself.
W. C. Doane

We can do anything we want to do if we stick to it long enough.
Helen Keller

I have not the shadow of a doubt that any man or woman can achieve what I have, if he or she will make the same effort, and have the same hope and faith.
Mahatma Gandhi

Experience is the child of thought, and thought is the child of action.
Benjamin Disraeli

Don't wait for extraordinary opportunities. Seize common occasions and make them great.
Orison Swett Marden

Do we not all agree to call rapid thought and noble impulse by the name of inspiration?
George Eliot

No great man ever complains of want of opportunities.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Men do less than they ought,
unless they do all they can.
Thomas Carlyle

We are all faced with a series of great opportunities - brilliantly disguised as insoluable problems.
John Gardner

Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true.
Leon J. Suenes

The power of imagination makes us infinite.
John Muir

First say to yourself what you would be;
and then do what you have to do.
Epictetus

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Wayne Gretzky Motivational Quotations We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle Take calculated risks. That is quite different from being rash. George S. Patton Storms make oaks take roots. Proverb If you do not hope, you will not find what is beyond your hopes. St. Clement of Alexandra Dream big and dare to fail. Norman Vaughan With will one can do anything. Samuel Smiles We are all inventors, each sailing out on a voyage of discovery, guided each by a private chart, of which there is no duplicate. The world is all gates, all opportunities. Ralph Waldo Emerson When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems you could not hang on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn. Harriet Beecher Stowe Seek the lofty by reading, hearing and seeing great work at some moment every day. Thornton Wilder The only way of finding the limits of the possible is by going beyond them into the impossible. Arthur C. Clarke Well begun is half done. Greek Proverb The best way out is always through. - Robert Frost Without inspiration the best powers of the mind remain dormant. There is a fuel in us which needs to be ignited with sparks. Johann Gottfried Von Herder Life consists not in holding good cards, but in playing those you hold well. Josh Billings And all may do what has by man been done. Edward Young Hope is like the sun, which, as we journey toward it, casts the shadow of our burden behind us. Samuel Smiles Work spares us from three evils: boredom, vice, and need. Voltaire If the wind will not serve, take to the oars. Destitutus ventis, remos adhibe Latin Proverb Men's best successes come after their disappointments. Henry Ward Beecher No star is lost once we have seen, We always may be what we might have been. Adelaide Proctor He turns not back who is bound to a star. Leonardo Da Vinci You cannot plough a field by turning it over in your mind. Author Unknown Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking. William B. Sprague Strong lives are motivated by dynamic purposes. Kenneth Hildebrand Nothing will ever be attempted if all possible objections must first be overcome. Samuel Johnson Fortune favors the brave. Publius Terence When the best things are not possible, the best may be made of those that are. Richard Hooker He who hesitates is lost. Proverb If you want to succeed in the world must make your own opportunities as you go on. The man who waits for some seventh wave to toss him on dry land will find that the seventh wave is a long time a coming. You can commit no greater folly than to sit by the roadside until some one comes along and invites you to ride with him to wealth or influence. John B. Gough An oak is not felled at one blow. Spanish Proverb In doubtful matters boldness is everything. Publilius Syrus Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds. Albert Einstein Amazing how we can light tomorrow with today. Elizabeth Barrett Browning In every difficult situation is potential value. Believe this, then begin looking for it. Norman Vincent Peale Believe with all of your heart that you will do what you were made to do. Orison Swett Marden Each day I look for a kernel of excitement. In the morning, I say: "What is my exciting thing for today?" Then I do the day. Barbara Jordan Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is not enough; we must do. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe We are still masters of our fate. We are still captains of our souls. Winston Churchill Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm. Ralph Waldo Emerson Reach perfection. Baltasar Gracián For hope is but the dream of those that wake. Matthew Prior Constant dripping hollows out a stone. Lucretius Nothing contributes so much to tranquilize the mind as a steady purpose-- a point on which the soul may fix its intellectual eye. Mary Shelley   Words of Wisdom / Thoughts to Live By Nature and wisdom never are at strife. Plutarch It is easier to be wise for others than for ourselves. Francois De La Rochefoucauld The art of being wise is knowing what to overlook. William James The first step in the acquisition of wisdom is silence, the second listening, the third memory, the fourth practice, the fifth teaching others. Solomon Ibn Gabriol Wisdom is better than gold or silver. German Proverb Years teach us more than books. Berthold Auerbach It is best to learn wisdom by the experience of others. Latin Proverb The great lesson is that the sacred is in the ordinary, that it is to be found in one's daily life, in one's neighbors, friends and family, in one's backyard. - Abraham Maslow The wisdom of nations lies in their proverbs, which are brief and pithy. William Penn The middle course is the best. Cleobulus The wise man should be prepared for everything that does not lie within his control. Pythagoras The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. Thomas Huxley A wise man learns by the mistakes of others, a fool by his own. Latin Proverb Silence does not always mark wisdom. Samuel Taylor Coleridge. Measure a thousand times and cut once. Turkish Proverb The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of non-essentials. Lin Yutang No man was ever wise by chance. Seneca He has not learned the lesson of life who does not every day surmount a fear. Ralph Waldo Emerson Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the men of old; seek what they sought. Matsuo Basho Learn to hold loosely all that is not eternal. A. Maude Royden Not to know at large of things remote From use, obscure and subtle, but to know That which before us lies in daily life, Is the prime wisdom. John Milton By associating with wise people you will become wise yourself. Menander The seat of knowledge is in the head, of wisdom, in the heart. William Hazlitt Of all parts of wisdom the practice is the best. John Tillotson The larger the island of knowledge, the longer the shore line of wonder. Ralph W. Sockman The more a man knows, the more he forgives. Catherine the Great A loving heart is the truest wisdom. Charles Dickens One who understands much displays a greater simplicity of character than one who understands little. Alexander Chase How prone to doubt, how cautious are the wise! Homer The man of wisdom is never of two minds; the man of benevolence never worries; the man of courage is never afraid. Confucius Wisdom is the sunlight of the soul. - German Proverb

20 TIPS TO ACHIEVE SUCCESS

1. Discipline; 

To be a successful man  you have to be discipline in what ever you do,

you have to learn how to drop your ego before your ego drops you , facing the task ahead of you  makes you strong,but dropping your ego makes you stronger, it not all about your opinion this time but you have to learn how to learn from your mistake as a man ,it a very hard task to let our ego go when it comes to management,but it will do you more good than harm if you drop it and term up to achieve something positive and something worth rejoicing for.

2. Time management

Way and how you use your time is very important and essential, when it comes to been successful, the series of things you do at a short paste goes a lone way in determining the amount of success you will record and achieve in a day , it is very difficult to control time but if you can manage it effectively ,it will go a long way in doing you more good than harn

3Faithfulness

You have to be faithful and truthful in all your dealing

4.Given

According to the Bible givers never lack, to be successful you have to learn how to give in other to get more ,

5.Information

Getting more information can go a long way in helping you which means you have to cultivate the habit of reading wide,there is a great saying which say "a man that is not informed  is deformed and there no two ways about it

6 Ask question

you have to learn how to ask questions when ever you are stoke because no make is an island of knowledge ,

7. God

In what  ever you do in life always remember to put God first because he is the creator of the universe,he known your starting point and your end

8. Learn how to control your night

The best way to think and invent ideas is at night ,if you can control your night meaning you can control your day too,

let me give you a little secret, everything that manifest at day has already been manipulated at night,before anybody dies he has already been judged at night before it manifest,if you can observe slightly they are more death recorded at midnight from 12 am to 2 am than at day, or let take example from the just concluded election in Nigeria ,the result was already manipulated at night before it manifested at day time

9 Be careful of women 

The easiest way for a successful man to fail is by the help of a woman, take example from the bible Adam failed because of Eve, the fact still remains that women are emotional in nature while men are are logical, women always think about how to secure their man no matter how rich and educated they may be while men always planning on how to get a better life for himself and his family.

10

 Always seek for advice when necessary  because it will go a long way in helping you

11

learn how to take decision

12

Take people around you as important as yourself

13

learn how to control what you say to others

14

Do not try to outshine your master no matter how brilliant or wise you may think you are,the main reason president jonathan of Nigeria failed was not because of the vote the issue was tied on the fact that he was trying to outshine his master,

15

Learn how to be a problem solver

Bills gate today is among  the world richest men , because he was able to solve a problem,the  man  who invented mobile toilet today is very rich because he was able to study his environment and know what they need, it very easy to solve a problem than to create one

16

Learn how to respect people no matter their status or how they look,their looks or status does not really matter but what they posses matters allot

17

Learn how to handle your responsibility

18

dont defy your bed if you are married, which simply means dont go out sleeping around 

                                                                          19
                                                                 obey you parent
                                                                              20
                                            always be prayerful and hard working because hard work pays